Night of Cake and Puppets (Daughter of Smoke and Bone #2.5) by Laini Taylor

I couldn't even read this. After I downloaded it on my Kindle I just looked at the book cover art the whole night. Okay, stared. I stared. And ogled. And almost drooled. That was how happy I was when I got it. And shocked because I've been waiting for the final book of the trilogy and I never even heard of a 2.5. I suck at being a fangirl.

So yeah, I was staring at it and I was squealing (deep inside, Rhoda, stop looking over your cubicle!).

I mean, what Daughter of Smoke and Bone fan wouldn't?! It's the Zuzana & Mik story! Zuzana isn't the main character ... but that's just what they want us to think. Because in reality, she's made us all into puppets to do the things that she wants us to do. Like falling in love with her voodoo eyes and her rabid sense of humor and extremist wit.

Guess it's a good thing I didn't know about it right away because it came as a very pleasant surprise. The bad thing is that now I want to cry thinking how long April 2014 is from now.

2014 Goodreads Reading Challenge

Three books to go and I'm already thinking of my goal next year. I think I will do 2 books per month whose authors I have never read. To add a little flavor (yes I'm this bored), at least one of those authors should have initials that start with the first letter of the month. So maybe a Jennifer <insert-last-name-here> or an <insert-first-name-here> Johns for January (or June or July). All in all I should read at least 24 books (God I'm good at math!).

I said "at least" because there are a few books I've been waiting for that will come out some time in 2014 so I'll just add those to my goal as I go on. Like this book below whose cover makes me wanna cry. I wish it's April already.

I'm also waiting on the last installment of the Books of Beginning by John Stephens. I just checked and it has a title now! The Black Reckoning. It's the Emma book we (fans of Books of Beginning) are all waiting for. I wonder if Daniel O'Malley will release book 2 of the Checquy Files? Or if Markus Zusak will finally release Bridge of Clay.
Anyhoo, I'm sure there will be no shortage of books to read. What books are you waiting for come 2014?

The Morrow Secrets (Tallitha Mouldson 1) by Susan McNally

I took me forever to get through this. It's not the book. It's me. It's interesting enough. I love fantasy but this is hard for me to get into. I get so lost the whole time I don't even know how to write a decent-enough review.

A few months ago I went on training to write product descriptions. We were assigned to go through the manual before discussing it. I had issues with that manual. Chapter one would mention a certain process in passing like we should know what that is already and when we get to chapter 10, whoever wrote the manual suddenly feels the need to explain what the process is all about. It's annoying because I spent a lot of time on the first chapter trying to understand what I was missing and when I finally got to where it was explained I have to go back to first chapter and say, oooooooooh. That was kind of how this story was for me. When I realized that the Grand Morrow's "butler" was a shrove I was like wait what? What's a shrove? And then it gets explained ... I dunno ... a few paragraphs after? Maybe on the next chapter? I find that so annoying.

Maybe I'll try to read this again another time.

Weekend Shmeekend ... a little R&R in the comforts of Makati

I'm kind of embarrassed that I've lived in Makati for 8 years and I've never been to the Salcedo Saturday Market and the Legazpi Sunday Market so I did both this weekend with the help of a couple high school buddies. It wasn't anything fantastic but I liked going from stall to stall and just look at what's there. 

Predictably, this alcohol-dependent woman got herself:

TADAAAAH!: Japanese Ale

Not a big fan of beer but it was there and it's alcohol and it was spelling my name ... ok, my name isn't Hitachino Nest but it's alcohol. It's supposed to taste bitter and sweet and smell spicy according to that nice lady who was selling it. She's right about the bitter part. It's not sweet at all. Budweiser is sweet. Red Horse is sweet. German beer, in general, is sweet. This? It's just bitter. Oh and it looks like iced tea. I don't have a photo. I drank straight from the bottle but spilled some when opening so I know it looks like iced tea. Google it. it is 250pesos a bottle. She had other Hitachino Nest stuff ... I didn't get the name of the stall because I was too happy to be holding alcohol after how many weeks (which felt like forever). She'll probably be there again next week.

Non-alcoholic ginger ale

This is from Stanford x Shaw Brewing. It's goooooood. They give out samplers if you wanna try before buying (and if you don't believe me). It tastes like, well, ginger ... and lemon. It kind of reminds me of Boones Farm products, if you know that, except this is non-alcoholic (but Boones has so little alcohol content anyway it feels like drinking soda). This is 200php for a 600ml (I think) bottle. They were nice enough to offer to keep it in their ice chest, in case you want to go around the area first before going home, because you're supposed to keep it refrigerated but we were going home anyway. They also said to consume it within 2 weeks and I said they didn't have to worry about that. Heh.

Satinka Naturals: Beeswax Moisturizing Lip Balm

Wala lang. Ang mahal kasi ng Burt's Bees and I'm cheap like that so I got this instead. Haha! It's a 10g stick and costs only 100php. They have it in lavender, mint and grapefruit. These would make nice christmas giveaways.

I also bought a lot of other stuff like ... food. I mean, you can't go there and not eat. I especially loved the Ilocos empanada, I haven't had that in forever and it's good to know I don't have to travel far to get it when I'm craving for it (I just have to wait for the weekend). They are 50pesos a piece.

I noticed another stall selling sandwiches for 150php at the Salcedo market that sold sandwiches for 120php at the Legazpi market. I guess these are food they weren't able to sell the previous day. The stalls in both community markets are almost the same, but the Sunday market has more choices and it's bigger but the Saturday market looks more organized from the stalls to security to layout.

The Legazpi Sunday Market

The Salcedo Saturday Market ... from the outside

===

Also went to the spa that my sister and her friend frequents. Like beer, I'm also not big on spas. I have issues with strangers touching me but I like to occasionally pamper myself especially since I stopped using lotion when I started pole dancing. We had the Nature Scrub (that left me bruised), the Tightening Body Wrap for detox and that's supposed to help loose skin (if done continuously) and a hair spa. I liked the body wrap thing. It felt comforting and secure being wrapped in the ...erm, white clay wrap thingy. I should've gotten a massageas well. Anyhoo, maybe next weekend. For rates, try their website. 

Myriad by Mona Hanna

Reading Myriad is like skipping sentences and paragraphs to get to the good parts. Except you're not really skipping anything. The story just took the term fast-paced seriously. I didn't see "short story" in the list of genres so I didn't realize this is one. It's 95 pages, though. Long enough for print, I guess. I'm a book nearer my goal this year so I'm not complaining. Lol.

I liked that it's a stand alone. I also liked that it's free! Check it out on Amazon, it might still be. If you're looking for a quick fantasy read (wait that didn't sound right, heh) this might be something you'd like.

I think if the author worked on the plot more it could be a whole novel. As it is, it was just okay.

Why We Broke Up by Daniel Handler

What guy, in any universe, would read a "letter" that is 300+ pages long explaining "Why We Broke Up"? To start with, he's a jock and he's not really fond of reading. That wasn't a stereotype. It was stated in the story. She's the ex-girlfriend, she should know he doesn't like to read. So ... yeah. 

I had a lot to say about this book while I was reading it. I forgot most of them so I'll just say stuff at random (like I don't normally do that). 

On Min's classic films obsession: I think it's amazing how anyone can remember all those films and compare a lot of situations and even facial expressions to a specific scene. I had to Google a lot of those movies, mind you. Then again I'm not a movie buff to begin with.

The prose was ok ... ish. It got boring at some parts so I guess that's why, in some reviews I read, they said Min was whiny. I dunno. I'm pretty sure every brokenhearted girl got whiny at some point. So I forgive her. Lol. I think it's just too long an explanation. The prose was sort of a mix. Some parts were raw and some ... literary. It was a bit funny when the prose goes Yoda.

Onion rings, they were 

Put it in water, I could have done

I liked the end part where she described all her insecurities because that's what happens when you're brokenhearted. I didn't like that her insecurities amounted to about 2-3 pages.

This wasn't the insecurity part. Posting that would amount to copyright infringement or something.

Honestly, I bought the book because it had illustrations. I'm fickle like that. Also because the price dropped. Lol. It was Php699 when I first saw it a year ago. Regular price now is Php489. I'm actually happy I waited. Because I didn't like the book. I liked parts of it. Like the illustration and some quotes and the ending but not the book as a whole. Because again, why would a guy read this? And also because after everything that she said, after explaining the differences they had and how hard it was living in different circles and all those other long explanations of why they couldn't be together ... they really only broke up because ***SPOILER ALERT*** he cheated on her.

If anything this is a good YA book because it also discusses sex among teenagers and it clearly states that if you have sex when you're a minor your bf will end up cheating on you. I kid. I kid.

Agnes and the Hitman by Jennifer Crusie and Bob Mayer

 You know how some movies would start with a scene where there are a lot of people talking at the same time? Or there are multiple conversations going on at once? Or there are two people talking on the phone and the screen is split into two. That was kind of how this book started. Or, I think, that was what it was trying to do. Except in movies, scenes like that makes sense. Here, I felt like an outsider. I don't necessarily have to relate or be involved in a story for me to appreciate it but the first 20% of the book didn't sit well with me. It got better for me when LL came into the story. I liked her character.

Loved this part lol

One thing I wasn't sure if I'm going to love or hate about the story is Agnes's cooking. The pancakes and ham in that one breakfast scene made me hungry and crave for ... well ... pancakes and ham. I liked the ending too so it kinda made up for the beginning lol. 

The Better Undead Series is Amazing and insert-more-amazing-adjectives-here by Brad Crainer and Ayn Reineke

 

I'm super fangirling over this series. I can't help it. I got this for free on Amazon during that Halloween weekend promo thing but they're supposed to release issues 1-6 in print (as one paperback!) and I'm super going to get it ... but that's probably not going to happen until next year (which sucks). Looks like the 4th installment is a Christmas special as per their website www.betterundead.com. If you want to check it out, the first issue is still free to download as of this writing.  

I can't stress enough how super awesome and super brilliant this is without using the words super and awesome and brilliant so maybe just go check that link.

But before that:

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Ellin: Why did you stab your boyfriend in the eye with my breast cancer awareness stapler?
Ryan: She just stabbed you with the world's stupidest stapler! You have to learn when to let go!
====

BEST.SCENE.EVER.

Memoirs of a Teenage Amnesiac by Gabrielle Zevin

 

That cover

Hmm ... hmmmmmmmm. Heh. I was expecting to give this at least 4 stars since it was highly recommended. But maybe that was the problem. How about I just make a list in line with Mr Porter's obsessive list-making. Don't worry. I'm pretty sure mine won't be as long.

Things I liked about the book:

• The prose was easy and simple.

• Therefore it's a fast read.

• But there's also depth without being pretentious.

• It has a nice ending. Pretty realistic.

• Nice cover too.

• She thought about amnesia instead of <insert-any-other-health-related-issue-here>.

Things that I didn't-necessarily-not-like-but-I-found-meh about the book:

• Other than the amnesia I don't find anything else worth noting.

• The conflicts between and within the characters are pretty much run of the mill.

• As in, you could've inserted any other health problem and the teenage character can still use it as an excuse for pretty much everything.

•  Which was what the main character did. 

•  I think I would've been happier if she didn't end up with anyone.

•  Puberty. So overrated.

•  Um ... yeah.

Over all (and to be fair), I would say it was extremely well-written and that alone makes it a worthy read. :)

I Book Scavenged Over the Weekend

As if I didn't have more than enough books on my to-read stack, I went to my favorite second-hand bookstore branch over the weekend. This time I got 9 books for Php420 and I'm not sure when I'm going to read them but they're really nice to look at ... especially those bright, colorful chick lit pieces I never thought I'd buy. I don't have anything against chick lit, I just didn't grow up reading them so I never bothered but Rainbow Rowell happened. 

November book loot

The Undomestic Goddess by Sophie Kinsella. I was actually really looking for this. Saw it on Goodreads when browsing recommendations based on the last chick lit that I read ... and loved. This is the most expensive buy among the loot but Php180 isn't bad. At all. And it's yellow.

Dark Paradise by Tami Hoag. The last Tami Hoag mystery thriller piece that I was looking for. Now my collection is complete ... until she releases a new one. Funny thing, the first copy I saw of this cost Php105 and it was so battered I though twice about buying it. Then I came across this one and the tag said Php15 so ... yeah. Lol.

Man of Her Dreams by Tami Hoag. Php55. She started as a romance writer, you know?

The Safe House by Nicci French. Php40. I read a couple books by Nicci French back in college (after watching Killing Me Softly!) and I remember liking them so there.

Sula by Toni Morrison. It's a Nobel Prize winner, it's Toni Morrison and it cost only Php5. The selling factor, however, was the fact that it had doodles.

Adam by Ted Dekker. I keep seeing this on Goodreads and the shops so I said I'll read his books someday. I just held off from buying since most of the stuff I saw are part of a series and I didn't want to start a new one since it's too much commitment (heh) but this is a stand alone and cost only Php25.

Mr. Sebastin and the Negro Magician by Daniel Wallace ... the guy who wrote Big Fish!!! Php25.

The Self-Preservation Society by Kate Harrison. Php25. It's blue.
















Up To No Good by Victoria Corby. Php50. It's green.

Physik (Septimus Heap Book Three) by Angie Sage

Allow me to read between the lines. Or too much into the story. 

Somehow I liked this book better than the first two. Although the characters are slowly growing up and we see more "evil" in the new antagonists rather than the comical characters of DomDaniel and Simon (I mean, who's gonna take a character named DomDaniel seriously? Okay maybe Simon but that's beside the point. Heh.), it's still too much of a children's book in a way that it's a bit predictable. Except what happened to Nicko and Snorri in the end, that kind of surprised me.

Physik is the first one that made me accept the fact that the series is named after Septimus Heap. Septimus is starting to be the 7th son of a 7th son. I now see the potential. Lol. I think that was why I didn't rave for Magyk and Flyte. It made him just "one of those" characters and I needed to feel something great from a main character to be able to love them.

The one thing I REALLY liked about this book, however, is the satire-ish instances. Kinda reminds me of what characters represent in the Discworld series. Thinking back, there's a satirical side to the series ever since, but it wasn't as pronounced for me. Here's a few I can think off of the top of my head.

The Rat Stranglers could be a group of people taking action about things they don't understand. They choose to blame something else (that they don't understand as well). It makes people feel better that they're trying to do something, even though it's obvious it's not solving anything. It was funny, too, how they had some sort of a mob song that didn't make sense. Just a lot of kill, kill, kill and splat, splat, splat in it. Silas Heap and Gringe is another example. Here are two men who hated each other's guts from the time they saw each other but somehow manage to set their differences aside for the love of sports. Well, a board game but you get the drift. Silas is also one of those men who we're all so familiar with from movies or TV shows. A man who has a wife who has a lot of money so he stops working and writes a book that no one knows about or if it will be published (in this case, this is a man who has an adoptive daughter who turned out to be the princess and ends up pursuing his hobbies rather than providing for the family. Don't get me wrong, I love Silas.). Oh and Stanley and Dawnie? Don't even get me started on them. Lol.

Discovering Susie Suh ... and Rediscovering James Spader

I was in bed the whole day and normally I'd read but somehow I ended up looking for something to watch. Been meaning to check out Blacklist, I just put it off because I thought it was just like White Collar but then I'm a huge James Spader fan from the Boston Legal days so, why not? Megan Boone is great but I can't help imagining Olivia Wilde in this role. James Spader is ... well, James Spader and man he got old. Lol. I'm loving the show, though. Does anyone else think Ryan Eggold would make a hot husband? Never mind that he's a multi-passport holder spy. Heh.

On a Blacklist related note, Susie Suh's single Here With Me was used in episode 3 and is making news ... maybe I'm a few weeks late and it's not news anymore but I'm in love with it. The lyrics, the voice, the sound is chilling and haunting and is everything I want in a song. And this is when I leave you to bask in its amazing glory.

My Dreams Are Way Beyond The Dream Dictionary's Powers Of Interpretation ... and random ramblings

Sorry, I had to share this dream. Normally, I don't. I write it down in my journal because someday I will use it as content for my book ... which I REALLY need to get started on. Last night's dream was just amazing and disturbing (and that's something coming from me) at the same time so I had to.

Little history, I rarely have normal dreams. The most normal was when I dreamed my friend adopted a baby crocodile. That's normal because she's weird (Hi, Pearly). You may argue most dreams are weird. It's our subconscious in the first place and sometimes our subconscious think things we don't even want to think of ... consciously. Heh. But I've shared dreams to people and they said my dreams aren't normal. Actually, they said I'm not normal ... but that's for a different story.

So last night's dream involved: my friends, my hometown, the house where I was raised, a co worker, dogs, a duck, a crocodile, cambodia, a train, the hound(ish), 5 restaurants from a made up movie, my nephew's school service driver, a toilet with leftover chicken and chicken bones (eugh), native americans, goons, a kid ... and super powers.

By this time I forgot how it started but the setting was the apocalypse. Not zombie-type apocalypse although I had a zombie apocalypse-themed dream couple weeks ago. Anyhoo, I was in my hometown, people are starving but there's apparently a feast for the well-off ... IKR?! How politically and socially mainstream is that?! Lol. So I saw this kid looking for something to eat and I had ground pork (pang shanghai rolls) that mysteriously appeared out of nowhere and I said: "Here, you have it. But you'll need wrappers for that." My nephew's school service driver appeared out of nowhere and said: "I'll take care of it." He then produced the wrappers. Little did we know he stole it ... from a guy who, well, looks like a goon. I can't find a photo of the local goon from the old Filipino movies but let's just say he's kind of like the hound on steroids (yes from the Game of Thrones series). Like really huge with long hair and really scary. COMMERCIAL: I tried to Google the goon so I could post a photo and I typed: Filipino movie goons and a photo of the former president GMA appeared on the list. I should've screen capped.

So now, this guy is after me thanks to the school service driver. Fucker. So I had to get away. I walked and walked and I know I can't stop. It's either I face the dogs on the street (dogs scare me shitless no matter what size, true story) or go back and face the scary goon. He finally caught up when I was contemplating if I should face the dogs or him. Stupid. We were in someone's backyard, with chicken wire fences. I said something like: "ok, come and get me" and I smiled (fuck im so mainstream). That was where it got interesting. When he lunged at me, I jumped over the fence. It was over 8 feet high. I'm like 4ft 10in (barely). But he's a goon, with a huge wrestler body so chicken wires won't stop him, right? Now, there was another chicken wire fence behind me and you know what I did??? I PASSED THROUGH THE CHICKEN WIRE! Hell yeah, I'm awesome!!! So! Somehow that stalled him. I don't know if he couldn't get through the wire or he was just dumbstruck by my awesomeness. 

I thought I won't see him again so I stayed in the house on the other side of the fence. Which turned out to be the house where I grew up. But it was stripped except for a flat screen TV. It was huge. Go figure. I turned on the lights and the TV and then I realised people will notice the lights are on (this was night time). I was running away. Duh. The goon showed up he challenged me again, I smiled again and he came at me with ... something, I dunno. But the next minute he was on the floor on his back, and I had my foot on his neck.

Me: 2 
Goon: 0

Did I mention there was a duck? Like, the whole time. The duck turned into that kid. The one I gave food to. And he said: stop fighting! And we did. And all of a sudden the goon and I are friends ... and we were both watching TV. 

By now you must be thinking where's the twist. There's none. But there was a guy at the back of the house the whole time we were there. He was also watching TV (and it was morning all of a sudden) and he was drinking beer and there were kids running around. One of the kids sneaked in the house and I saw that he saw us and I didn't mind. And then I looked at the window in front (the one that looks out to the street) and I saw other people (who looked like goons too) with huge guns and shit. And I was like, TURN THE LIGHTS OFF! AND THE TV TOO! WHAT ARE YOU?! STUPID?! But it was too late. The men got in. I thought for sure we were dead. But they just stood there, the guy who was at the backyard went in too. I thought he looked grandfather-ish. And he started talking about god-knows-what. But first, I have to point out, these guys with the guns and the grandfather-ish? They were native Americans ... I'm in the Philippines. Go figure. By this time, me, the goon friend, and the boy that was a duck were backed up in a corner. Grandfather-ish pulled out a gun and shot at us like there was no tomorrow. All I could do was freeze while holding a book against my chest. And that was when we died.  Or the goon and the kid died.

I woke up ... in a train going to Cambodia. My shirt had blood spatters on the chest area. I felt like I was still running away. Naks, drama. When we got there (I was with my friends and it didn't feel like the apocalypse anymore), wherever that was, we were apparently in search of 5 restaurants featured in a book-turned-hollywood-hit (I don't know if it actually exists) and all were in Cambodia (I don't know how I knew it was Cambodia, either). At the third restaurant I realized we had one of my co-worker with us. I will call him DenMunch. And we were all talking like we were food and film critics. Lol. And then I went to the toilet. It was disgusting. It had chicken bones and chicken left overs in the seat like someone tried to flush those down and I was like: "OMFG this is disgusting!" I had to wipe it away cause I had to pee ... with all my friends there (there was also an ex boyfriend in the group in that dream, probably because it was a toilet scene and I think he's shit ... erm never mind). The toilet seat was in front of the dining table. And we had to pay to use the toilet. On top of the food bill. Disgusting, I know. But go figure.

We went out to the 4th restaurant. It was sort of al fresco. We were waiting for our orders and I thought I'd go for a walk by the beach. Sunset, you know? But there was a crocodile. We were at Puerto Princesa by that time. And by this time, if you're still reading, you should know better than ask how we got to Puerto Princesa.Also, the duck was back.

I woke up. Like for real this time. And I was late for work.

The Seventh Commandment by Lawrence Sanders

Lawrence Sanders is one of the first authors I've read. I was in high school and might have been a bit young for his genre at that time but when you're a kid and have limited book resources you can't be picky lol. I got his books from my dad's little library. I thought this one lacked the ... whatever it is I got from his books before lol. I remember I liked the other commandments and deadly sins books. This one, not so much. Also, I can't remember if his style in writing dialogues in this book is the same as it was before. If it was then I will charge it to inexperience lol. It's a bit annoying reading it:

John, you should blah blah
Red, what do you think blah blah
Terry, listen, blah blah
John, you look like etc

Other than that, it still has the Sander's signature when it comes to drama, intrigue, and a dirty secrets. I guess I can say Lawrence Sanders is my Sydney Sheldon except Sanders' novels has more police work going on.

This is one of the books I got at the Book Sale that I blogged about few weeks ago.