The Light of the Fireflies by Paul Pen

This is one of my "oooh-nice-cover!" reads. It's also one of the "wtf-did-i-just-get-myself-into" reads. I understand the hype. It's just not something I can jump into. The plot was very promising but it didn't quite cut it because it was stretched too thin and the twist felt like it was thrown there for the lack of imagination. The same can be said with the lack of names. The first person narration (through the eyes of a boy) might be the reason for that but it didn't sit right when the past was told in a third person's voice. I have no problem with switching from first person to third person when reading as long as it's clear why the switch is made. It is clear in this book. However, I had a problem with this kind of story telling: "The sudden intrusion of his granddaughter's voice made Grandpa initiate a series of movements that he did not complete ... Grandma closed her eyes, hugging the boy preparing for the worst. The woman looked at the roll of posters that her daughter had been putting up ... She sighed, accepting what would happen if she discovered what her brother had done. The man rushed to the girl's body." I mean, my little brain can only take too much. Who is "she"? Is it the grandmother, the mother or the daughter? Okay I'm exaggerating, but still ... wtf?! It's also not clear where the behavior came from. Most especially the sister's angst. That is more than just teenage angst. I'm no expert in behavioral analysis but I'm pretty sure emotions don't come out without a trigger. Even the flashback chapter where everything that led them into their current situation was well, very thin. I wanted to give up halfway through the book but I also wanted to know what will happen which was very annoying. I meant my situation was annoying ... but, yes, the ending was annoying too. One star only.

Crooked Little Lies by Barbara Taylor Sissel

It's hard to touch controversial issues when writing fiction. I don't know if the story was trying to make any point other than entertain but I found the whole thing so judgmental so if it was, then everything that the characters did inside the story defeats its purpose. Yes, it talked of how people should empathize with people with disabilities and how they can function in the society. It talked about how they are judged but I think the book itself was judging. Even the people who were trying to help the people who needed help were judgmental. 

If one tells a lie that one cannot support then the cover is blown. I think this would've been a great plot if enough research was made. It's like putting one issue over another without the right foundation. It will eventually fall apart. It's so muddled with emotions that doesn't make sense. One might argue emotions rarely do but emotions do have a source. Every bit of reaction is a cause of a previous action. The story puts one issue over another and a pile like that just won't stand. 

All that being said, I would like to congratulate myself for finishing this book.

1 star.

Teenage Love Spell by Gabrielle Dela Cruz

This reminds me of the stories I wrote in high school. I wrote a ton for my friends to read and I was always so happy when they liked whatever it is. I wouldn't want anyone I know now to read any of them. Good thing I don't have them anymore. Termites. Lol. Not saying this isn't something people shouldn't read, I just think that the author needs to look for the right audience to be able to get the right reviews. I guess nobody-teenager-falls-in-love-with-popular-guy-who-she didn't-know-is-crushing-on-her-too doesn't work for me anymore. For the record, I do know this would be a teenage love story (it's in the title ... im smart like that LOL) but I read almost anything that's fiction so when the author left a comment on my post on Instagram I went ahead and got it on Amazon Kindle. It was free at that time so what would I lose? So yeah, if you're into that kind of thing this costs $2.99, I think. Not bad.

Also (and more importantly), I think this needs a bit more copy editing/proofreading but ... still, it's amazing that aspiring novelists are given an opportunity to publish easily. If anything, this actually inspired me to write fiction again ... although it wouldn't be something so highschool. 

Oh, Never Mind by Mary H.K. Choi

It's nice to find a quick, non-fiction read you can relate to. I'm not from NY nor am I an Asian with a green card/living in a foreign country, and I'm not planning on moving anywhere (at least within the next 365 days). I am, however, single, in my 30s (not young but not old, heh), was (ok, still am sometimes) a freelance writer and have, at one point or another, ended up saying "Oh, Never Mind!"

All biographies should be this short. Personally, I'd rather read a short one about the subject of growing up and being matured rather than something that started when the person came out of their mother's womb only to find out on page 793 that it's all about justifying something the said person regrets.

Favorite part: "These days, if I make an appearance at a party or event, there's a solid chance I'm wearing at least part of an outfit I wore to bed. I owe myself that much."

Cool cover too!

Insatiable: Porn - A Love Story by Asa Akira

Generally, in porn, there's gonzo (straight up sex) and feature films (think glamour/erotica with a script so that means everything else that has anything more than just sex). I would say this book falls under gonzo for the reason that it's just straight up I'm-a-porn-star-and-this-is-what-I-do (which we already know). There's a lot of "scenes" of her describing what she does and how she feels during her porn shoots as well. It's pretty entertaining and I can't help chuckling at how corny and scripted a guy (who'd pay 5k USD to be with her for half an hour) could be about his fantasies, but I guess that's how it really is.

I half-knew what to expect from this because a friend already read it ahead of me and had already told me what he thought of it but I'm still a little disappointed. I'm not well-versed with autobiographies (having read only 2 or 3 before this) but I was expecting it to be, well, an autobiography. Turns out it is and it isn't. 

The whole book is a journal, bits and pieces of things (with no order whatsoever) the author felt like talking about in a very conversational tone (too conversational they managed to say this other porn star is also a NY native over and over like "hey I'm just talking and I can't edit what already came out of my mouth"). Overall, it's a loop between how she loves sex and how she's in love with the porn industry with a spattering of her drug dependency, abortion, swinging, justifying being in a relationship with a guy who everyone thinks/knows to be gay etc. here and there, and in that way, it's a memoir. A lot of times, though, you'd also feel that she's writing "in character" so it may not be all ... real. In the end, I decided this is something you would purchase for the same reason that you would want to watch her in one of her porn movies except, here, you'd have to use your imagination more.

Bubba and the Dead Woman by C.L. Bevill

You know how sometimes you've been reading too much heavy and -- err ...serious stuff that you want to take a break from all the heaviness and seriousness? Not that I've been reading anything heavy and serious lately (heh), I just don't want to read anything along those categories so I looked for something light ... and not serious. Enter Bubba and the Dead Woman. It's an easy read and it was funny so I thought it was perfect to bring the reading streak back (I've been really bad lately). 

The best thing about this is that it's free (I'm not gonna lie lol) so look it up on Kindle. The next books cost $0.99 to $1.99 so it's a good deal. Story-wise, it's a no brainer. Guy gets framed for a murder he didn't commit blah blah ... pretty straight up. Some parts are hilarious but some parts that are supposed to be hilarious drag. Like the dog bits. Dog characters are either cute or funny. Too much dog references that doesn't have anything to do with the story makes you just want to "say stop it with the dog references already and get on with telling us who killed who."

Overall, it's easy to read (wait I already said that) and very entertaining (that too). Three stars.

The Seed and Other Fairy Tales by Joseph Hillenbrand ...100th book of the year :)

This is a writing debut, from what I gather, and when an author releases a book it's important not only to get exposure but also get the right audience. I'm big on short stories so I was ecstatic when I found out I was getting a free copy for review. Early this year, I took to reading adaptations of fairy tales (sleeping beauty and belle made into modern women and snow white and red riding hood in erotica) which I got bored of after a while. The Seed & Other Fairy Tales, however, is sort of a breath of fresh air.
Most reviews said this is a collection of quirky tales and after reading Unwished and Applebite, I had to agree. It would leave you thinking. These tales are dark. I was expecting some would be twisted too, although there is no promise of that in the blurb. Twisted just sometimes comes with dark lol. Broken down:

The Seed is a mix of traditional fairy tale and the modern world that won't be out of place in the original Grimm tales.

Unwished left me feeling too slow and unworthy haha. I'm really confused. SPOILER! Did the woman eat the rabbit (hasenpfeffer), the frog (cuisse de grenouille) and the fishes [smoothie - (yuck)]? Or did she bring them to the park because she knew the guy she fancies was going to be there and show off by granting the one wish he had (whatever that is)? 

The Girl in the Forest is one of my favorites. I liked how the man found out what the girl wants from each creature without being told what they were and the text don't say what those are (bluntly) too.

Two and One is pretty basic and funny. Of all the stories, this one might be most appropriate for children. I don't think the collection as a whole is suitable for kids. This is more of a fairy tale collection for older people.

Calimire is mostly a love story ... right? This is the more "traditional" fairy tale with evil step moms and love conquering all stuff.

My All ... talk about unpunished good deeds.

Hunger Pangs OMG I LOVE THIS. It's the shortest of the collection, I think. But the prose, the meaning behind each word, the literature ... gaaaah

Applebite ... when I dream the details are vivid. And random. And weird. Applebite reminds me of my subconscious. I don't know what to make of the ending, though.

Sand Castles is one of my favorites. I thought this would be a feel good kind of story, but alas. Lol. But I liked the ending.

In general, the prose is simple and ... fairy tale-ish. Lol. There are pretty good quotes in this book, that I highlighted on my Kindle and I was so sure that some would already be on Goodreads but looks like I have to add it myself. Speaking of quotes, it kind of reminds me of the first (and only) Paolo Coelho book (Mahktub) that I read ... but in a good way. Because, unlike the other one I actually enjoyed the seed. I would have finished this sooner if I wasn't so busy. It's a very easy and quick read.

So thanks for this, Mr. Hillenbrand. I think you just gained yourself a fan. Lol.

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In other news, this is my 100th book for 2013. :)

Night of Cake and Puppets (Daughter of Smoke and Bone #2.5) by Laini Taylor

I couldn't even read this. After I downloaded it on my Kindle I just looked at the book cover art the whole night. Okay, stared. I stared. And ogled. And almost drooled. That was how happy I was when I got it. And shocked because I've been waiting for the final book of the trilogy and I never even heard of a 2.5. I suck at being a fangirl.

So yeah, I was staring at it and I was squealing (deep inside, Rhoda, stop looking over your cubicle!).

I mean, what Daughter of Smoke and Bone fan wouldn't?! It's the Zuzana & Mik story! Zuzana isn't the main character ... but that's just what they want us to think. Because in reality, she's made us all into puppets to do the things that she wants us to do. Like falling in love with her voodoo eyes and her rabid sense of humor and extremist wit.

Guess it's a good thing I didn't know about it right away because it came as a very pleasant surprise. The bad thing is that now I want to cry thinking how long April 2014 is from now.

The Morrow Secrets (Tallitha Mouldson 1) by Susan McNally

I took me forever to get through this. It's not the book. It's me. It's interesting enough. I love fantasy but this is hard for me to get into. I get so lost the whole time I don't even know how to write a decent-enough review.

A few months ago I went on training to write product descriptions. We were assigned to go through the manual before discussing it. I had issues with that manual. Chapter one would mention a certain process in passing like we should know what that is already and when we get to chapter 10, whoever wrote the manual suddenly feels the need to explain what the process is all about. It's annoying because I spent a lot of time on the first chapter trying to understand what I was missing and when I finally got to where it was explained I have to go back to first chapter and say, oooooooooh. That was kind of how this story was for me. When I realized that the Grand Morrow's "butler" was a shrove I was like wait what? What's a shrove? And then it gets explained ... I dunno ... a few paragraphs after? Maybe on the next chapter? I find that so annoying.

Maybe I'll try to read this again another time.

The Better Undead Series is Amazing and insert-more-amazing-adjectives-here by Brad Crainer and Ayn Reineke

 

I'm super fangirling over this series. I can't help it. I got this for free on Amazon during that Halloween weekend promo thing but they're supposed to release issues 1-6 in print (as one paperback!) and I'm super going to get it ... but that's probably not going to happen until next year (which sucks). Looks like the 4th installment is a Christmas special as per their website www.betterundead.com. If you want to check it out, the first issue is still free to download as of this writing.  

I can't stress enough how super awesome and super brilliant this is without using the words super and awesome and brilliant so maybe just go check that link.

But before that:

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Ellin: Why did you stab your boyfriend in the eye with my breast cancer awareness stapler?
Ryan: She just stabbed you with the world's stupidest stapler! You have to learn when to let go!
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BEST.SCENE.EVER.